LGBThursdays: How to Come Out at Work

If you’re LGBTQIA*, coming out to your employers, coworkers, supervisors, and other staff on your team is definitely a personal choice. Some LGBTQIA* people may never feel the need to bring it up, for whatever reason. It may not ever come up in conversation or become an issue. However, many people feel the need to be honest about themselves, or may have specific reasons that require them to be honest – for example, if a transgender employee is facing discrimination for this reason by another coworker, and needs to tell their supervisor, or if a person in a same-sex relationship wants to invite their significant other to a work get-together.

Coming out at work is tricky business, because LGBTQIA* individuals still face workplace discrimination despite all of the community’s recent triumphs. Even in states, cities or counties where discrimination for reasons of sexual orientation or gender identity is illegal, employers can find other reasons to fire an employee to hide behind the truth: discrimination.

If you’re like me, and you want to enter a professional workforce, but you’re really looking to work long-term at a place where, if there’s a work party, you can invite your same-sex spouse, or if you mention your wife and kids, nobody throws up their arms, these tips are for you:

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Loud Hands: Why “Coming Out” as Autistic is Important

As promised, I am adding autism advocacy as a component of this blog. Every other Thursday, I will post LGBThursdays on LGBTQIA (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer/questioning, intersex, asexual) topics and alternating Thursdays I will post Loud Hands on autistic community topics.

Why am I adding autism advocacy to my blog? Most importantly, because I’m autistic. I used to run a side blog just on these issues, but it wasn’t very public and I didn’t feel comfortable sharing it with others. When I came out as bisexual in middle and high school, I never thought I’d have to “come out” again, but I do. I need to tell more people that I’m autistic.

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Dressing up Neutrals: How to Wear Neutral Colors Without Feeling Boring

Before I get into this post about wearing neutrals, I wanted to apologize to all my readers for not updating my LGBThursdays recently. I’m currently in the processing of adding autism advocacy to this blog, and LGBThursdays will switch off every other week with those posts. For now, I apologize for the lag, but I want the new addition to be as smooth as possible.

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I love color. Color is my go-to when it comes to wardrobe. Color and glitter. I’m well known for wearing all-rainbow outfits, or daring colors that draw attention to me. But I also use neutrals a lot, and I own a lot of neutrals. I wanted to talk about how, as a unique fashionista, I navigate the problem of making neutral colored clothing fun.

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LGBThursday: Is There a Such Thing as “Gay Fashion Sense?”

If you’ve ever looked at an effeminate-looking guy with excellent fashion sense and thought to yourself, “He must be gay,” then you’re guilty of doing what I think we all sometimes do – stereotyping based on clothing and appearance. I’m no stranger to being on both sides of this, so today I’m going to get to the bottom of the “gay fashion sense” debacle, debunk some myths about how LGBTQA people dress, and discuss how my fashion style plays into my sexual orientation.

Two things that are near and dear to me often come together in the same sentence – being LGBTQA and my fashion sense. I’m openly bisexual, and most people who encounter me on a personal level know that I am. I also wear as many colors as I can in a day, and was known as “The Tutu Girl” at my high school. I never thought of these two things as connected, but it’s strange how often people ask about my orientation simply based on what I wear.

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LGBThursday: Coming Out in College

For this first installment in the brand-new LGBThursdays, I’m going to write about coming out as LGBTQA* in college/university. It’s a very individual experience that people have different outcomes with, but I’d like to talk about potential ways to come out, how to deal with negative reactions and all the other nuances of coming out in a new place.

LGBThursdays are going to feature topics that are of interest to LGBTQA* people, such as coming out, dealing with negative reactions, relationships, discrimination, and advice. Want to submit a question or topic for advice? Go to the “contact” page here.

Coming out in college is hard. Maybe not as hard as coming out in high school, because college is supposed to be a more open-minded place – after all, you gotta pay to be here, right? That doesn’t mean people should underestimate how scary and hard it can be to come out in generally, never mind while you’re also juggling classes, extracurriculars and making new friends.

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Crafting the Perfect Gift: Cheap and Unique Ways to Express Your Love

Okay, confession time: my girlfriend (and yes, to my politically correct readers, we use the term ‘girlfriend,’ but you are free to say partner as well, ’cause it makes me feel like we’re partners in crime and that’s kind of cool) and I have been dating for 6 years, and we don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day. We never have. Valentine’s Day, to me, means giving chocolate or cards to my friends and gifts from my parents when I was a kid. My mom used to give me a locket every day on Valentine’s Day, because lockets are my fave and they’re in abundance around the time.

We do, ironically, celebrate February 15, which has meaning to us – it’s the anniversary of our first kiss. So what do we do on Feb. 14? Nothing. We spend time with our friends, mostly. I make chocolate covered stuff for people, and bake cookies, or whatever.

The trouble with celebrating Feb. 15 is that our yearly anniversary is only a month beforehand, and it’s always an expensive ordeal. We’re doing photo shoots, going places, and we spend a lot on dinner and after-dinner drinks. And we’re also young, and saving for our future. So who can help but want a cheap, but creative, way to express your love to someone, whether it’s romantic love or not? This year, and every other year, I try to find ways to show her I love her beyond just a hefty diamond with an even heftier price tag.

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(A photo of the front of my card to my girlfriend.)

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Preparing for a Photo Shoot

Preparing for a photo shoot can be tricky business, especially if you’re really into fashion and expressing your own style. I remember the first photo shoot I did – with my cousin, Nicole, when I was 13. I had no idea how to dress for a photo shoot, how to do my hair or makeup, or how to pose and look natural and still well put together. I’ve had a lot of practice since then, but I also don’t follow a lot of the “usual rules.”

In this post, I’ll mainly be talking about my two most recent shoots where I was not the photographer (since I also do DSLR photography myself) : the one on Jan. 16 for my 6 years with my girlfriend, and the one she and I did in the summer just for fun.

In the air

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